Hi there! It's been awhile since I've been back to talk to everyone. I hope that everyone is doing okay, and if not, that you're on the right track to feeling better. But don't get discouraged, there is sunshine in the future! I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression probably a couple of years ago, but I think I've had it at least ever since high school. I would get into fits of depression where I just didn't want to live. I never really contemplated suicide exactly, but I had told my mom "I just want to curl up in a black hole and just stay there". And it was hard on my relationship with my husband. He didn't understand at first, thought maybe that it was just "something in my head" that I was making up. Then he went to Iraq. I thought that I would completely collapse. There were days that I had to drag myself to work only to sit and stare at a computer screen not being able to do anything. But, my husband came back, and I've been remembering to take my medication. My doc put me on Effexor 75mg, and it seems to be doing pretty well. If I miss even just one day though, I can really feel it... I start to get all moody and ****y. And I still have my bad days, where I'll just cry for no reason, just want to punch something for no reason. But now I have a good support system (Now that my husband kinda knows what is going on) and I have some good drugs in my system. So I just wanted to let anyone out there know that there is happiness and sunshine and cute little bunnies (If that's what you want) ahead of you. It's hard to do, trust me I know, but you just have to keep telling yourself that. We may never be "normal", but hey! Who really is normal!!! To all of you who are having a bad day today... hang in there! It will get better... Just know of your support systems, don't keep it insinde... if all else fails, I think I can speak for everyone here that we're here for you! And to everyone having a good day today, congratulations! I hope the rest of your day continues to be great!
